Thus says the LORD:”The people who survived the sword found grace in the wilderness; when Israel sought for rest, the LORD appeared to him from far away. I have loved you with an everlasting love; therefore I have continued my faithfulness to you." (Jeremiah 31:2-3)
Let me tell you a story.
She is sixteen and she is broken. She is lost in a crowd, and lost in a dark world. She often tries to numb herself through seeking the approval of others and has found herself drowning in a sea of substance abuse, parties, and depression. She is aware that she is blind, and she hopes one day that she will be able to find solace. She hopes there is something better than what she has been living, because her decisions of "I'll stop tomorrow" keep colliding with her urges to see how far down the rabbit hole she can fall. She feels like the walking dead.
She finds herself sitting amongst a big crowd at Boiling Point, a camp hosted from a church that she goes to occasionally. This girl was brought there by her manager at work who she hardly knows, who said God had put it on her heart to pay for this girl to go to that camp so that they could be there together. She feels confused and goes simply because she hopes to one day truly know the God who speaks. She finds herself upset that she is there, on this day three years ago. She feels anxious and knows she is missing out on something that she knew her friends would be doing that night. She finds herself angry and off-center. The feeling of living 16 years without ever breathing, without ever looking up, without ever feeling like she wasn't just lost in a sea of people... It's getting to her. She doesn't want to be there and doesn't know when her anxiety, depression, and guilt will ever end.
That night, three years ago, she finds herself sitting in a chair, staring at a pastor she's never seen. He is telling them that Christianity isn't comfortable, and that it is time to let go. It is time to stop trying to fit in and it is time to stop living the life you know you weren't called to. It is time to let go and let God, and stop holding onto the control you try to have in life that has put you where you are. It is time to come home. Come home. Home? That word resonates comfort she doesn't know, because when she finds that she is constantly at war with herself - home is far and unknown. Home. He tells them to come home, run home. Home is theirs and home is calling them. He is calling them. He knows them. He knows your name and He is calling you, begging you to come home. Get up and run, even if it isn't comfortable. Christianity isn't comfortable, but His arms are. He is peace and He knows you. He is for you.
As students stand around her and they are worshiping, she finds herself sobbing in the back. She finds herself wondering why everyone else gets it and she doesn't, and she feels as though she is too far gone. She missed it. They have something she doesn't. For the first time she feels out of the crowd, but only because the crowd is finding freedom and she's in the back - watching. She is tired. She is worn. She is done. It is time to find it, and she won't give up until she does. For the first time ever she tries to believe the promises she has been told - He knows your name. He is for you.
He loves you, and He has a plan for you.
She finds herself walking up to the woman that paid for her to be there, and she pours her heart out before she can even think about it. She tells her everything. She tells her that she doesn't know what to do but that she is giving up. She is tired of trying and she needs help to see beyond her situation. Her manager, Sarah, looks her straight in the eyes and tells her that what she has done and what has happened to her doesn't define her. Sarah tells her about the God who is living and redemptive and loves her for who she is in that moment. She tells this scared little girl about a come-as-you-are God who paid the ultimate price so that we would never have to be apart from Him. Sarah tells her that she has been praying over her and for her, and that God is her advocate. He is for her and He will fight for her. She can come to Him, broken and weary and ready to give up. He sees her and makes her whole and full of joy. Sarah tells her of a God that has already conquered death, not just for her, but for everyone's sake. Sarah tells her that her sin is not beyond anyone else, but that sin is all the same and we are all forgiven the moment that we run to Him. We are all given a crown of love and victory over this life. For the first time, she feels the true freedom from weight of sin lift from her shoulders.
She realizes she doesn't have to do anything to gain that, but to lay it at His feet. They pray together and for the first time in her life she feels free because she knows that she has been set free from this world. The world cannot define her or tell her what she will be or what she will choose, but that she has been given the authority to be free and choose eternal life. She is free from the chains and strongholds of sin, she is new. He has made her new. For the first time she hears her Father's voice tell her that the old has gone and the new has come. She is His daughter, and oh...she is loved. Not for just who she will be, but who she is. In that moment. She is His.
They stand and walk to the front of the crowd who is lost in worship, and for the first time she raises her hands in surrender to the God who saved her. She sings with her whole heart as she feels it in line with His, for the first time. She knows that she is free from everything she thought she was bound to. After what seems like an eternity of being in the chains of sin, she is free. The beauty of the cross is that He bled grace. We never have to be held down by wondering how we can redeem our sin. The hardest part of being surrendered to Him is letting go and allowing ourselves to be free. It was a generous gift that is hard to accept because we can do nothing in return. He is the One that gives too much. His loves it too extravagant for us to understand. The hardest part believing. Could it be? Could it be that He has done all of this and I owe nothing? Could it be that this life can be a declaration of joy and freedom and love? Could it be that there is no hardship to face and there is no wall to climb - but that His grace is sufficient? Yes. Isn't it incredible? They sing Hosanna.
Hosanna, Hosanna, Hosanna in the Highest. I see a generation rising up to take their place with selfless faith, with selfless faith. I see a near revival, stirring as we pray and seek. We're on our knees. We're on our knees.
And she knows that is the truth, and that is the calling He has placed on her life. She knows she is called to rise up, above her circumstances and above this world. She knows that this place is where she wants to stay, completely surrendered to Him. She wants to be forever there, in a crowd of His children with their eyes and hearts set on Him and His love. His freedom. She is no longer lost in a crowd, but one in a Family of people who are just so in Love with Him.
And that is where she has stayed. For three years, three years today. He lifted me up three years ago today to see that I am in control of my choices and that is His gift. He has given us free will to freely love Him, and to see His strength and grace within this fallen world. He has freely given us the choice to choose His will and His plan so that we may walk in His love. I am in awe today to think of where I might be had He not called me by name three years ago, three years ago today. Yet I find that I can't even think of it for more than a second. I am too head-over-heels, madly in love with my Father to even glorify sin and giving it power by thinking those thoughts. It doesn't matter where I would be, because I'm not. I'm here, in His arms. Forever. This world has no power, because He has beautifully set us free. Lift your head and rise. No more tears, no more pain. He is for you and He has called you, by name. You are His. Nothing and no one in this world can ever separate you for this love. And no one can stop you from living in this freedom, wrapped in His grace.
Hosanna, Hosanna, Hosanna in the Highest!
comments (0)
Post a Comment